Fortunately for me, this week didn't include a list of disastrous events. Unfortunately for you, you cannot revel in my many mistakes that make you feel better about your life. However, I did manage to scrounge up a few....
On the way to my dentist appointment, I DID NOT excelerate across the railroad tracks as the caution light was blinking and the guard rails were descending just so I wouldn't get stuck waiting on a train. Nope, not me!
It was NOT ME who couldn't find a clean bowl to mix Avery's rice cereal in. It definitely was NOT ME who used the top of a margarita mixer/shaker from Chili's to feed my innocent daughter her breakfast.
While ordering dinner-to-go for my husband and parents this weekend at a restaurant just 3 miles down the road, I DID NOT accidentally call the OTHER location, 15 miles away in Suwanee. My husband DID NOT return to the car to tell me they don't have our order. I DID NOT march my pajama-clad self into that restaurant to demand our food, and that it be free, only to realize it was sitting 15 miles away at a different restaurant. We DID NOT end up driving all the way to Suwanee to get our dinner.
I am NOT at all a competitive person and feel the need to win everything I do. I was NOT upset when I lost the golf tee game at Cracker Barrel to my husband. That loss DID NOT result in me cooking homemade mashed potatoes, fried okra, fresh peas, and grandma's macaroni and cheese for dinner. I guess it wasn't a complete loss!